School troubles

Haven't posted in a long time. Not that I had no parenting issues, I keep procrastinating.

Well, let me share my recent problem. The school that Harini is attending has started a canteen. They sent a circular saying its mandatory for all kids. Obviously, I wrote back saying that though I welcome the idea and it might be useful to many, I am against making it mandatory and I would not opt for it. Since many parents were against it, for now the authorities are not pressing the matter. But without doubt they will force it on us soon.

Now this (and such other money making tactics of the school) prompted me to look for alternate schools. Hosur being such a small town does not provide great options and the only other decent option I have is TVS Academy, about which I am still gathering inputs, and let me tell you, I am getting very conflicting information 😟

Above all this is the biggest problem : Harini loves her current school. She loves her friends, teachers and everything about it. Truly speaking, even I find it reasonably good and comparable to Bangalore schools. They have got very good infrastructure, lots of extracurricular activities, exposure to national level competitions etc. Etc. And the best part is it is at a 5 minutes walking distance from my home !!!

On the negative side, lots of homework, marks oriented ... And of course money making techniques ..

My expectations from my kid's school is this :
enabling her to explore her interests,
making her confident and allowing her to voice her opinions, doubts without any fear,
Allowing her to experiment without being scared of failing,
Giving counselling about various educational opportunities when they reach 9th std and above,
And most importantly, let her know that success has nothing to do with your grades, it really does not matter if u got 90% or 95% in your 10th std. when you are 35 years old 😉 Well, if you get 50% it will probably matter, but as long as the kids are raised to believe in themselves and are allowed to pursue their passions, I am sure they will do just fine.

All the above and are not only school's responsibility but also a parent's. And I am really doubtful about finding such a school, at least in my town 😞

Am I expecting too much? What are your expectations from your kids school?

Team work in the Heaven

Do I believe in God? Yes, of course. And Harini is well fed with stories from Ramayana and Mahabharata and other devotional stories.  She sings Bhajans, Aartis and knows various Shlokas by heart.

One day, as we stood in the terrace watching a heavy downpour, Harini remembered the story of how Lord Krishna had saved the people of Gokul by lifting the Govardhana hill. She said "Amma, Lord Indra is up to his old tricks again". Then all of a sudden, she asked me about the seating arrangements in the Heaven. She wanted to know if all the Gods sat together or did they have different rooms or palaces. "Is it possible for Indra to share his room with Lord Agni?", she wondered.

Why didn't I get such questions clarified when I was little? :-(

Anyways, I told her that what was more important was to understand that we should respect nature's elements like water, fire etc. And maybe having separate gods for each element was to make people respect them and not take them for granted. I told her I imagined them to have their own palaces. She was convinced and did not probe further.

But, a few days back, we started reading "Sophie's world" by Jostein Gaarder. I initially thought it was a book for kids. However, it turned out to be a book on philosophy. Harini thoroughly enjoyed the book and said she wanted to be a philosopher on growing up. But when we reached a point in the story, where some myths related to Greek Gods are discussed and proved to be a myth, I stopped reading it with Harini. I am reading it alone though.

I am really confused. No matter what Jostein says, I know I would not lose my faith in God. But I don't want to impose my beliefs on Harini. I want her to know all different views and make her own choice. So, when can I give back the book to her? What would be the right age? 

What's in a 'sur'name?

One fine evening, Harini cut short her play time and came home running. She directly shot the question : "Amma, am I a Brahmin?. Kavya wants to know".

Initially, I wanted to say that this was out of syllabus and will be explained when she is 10 years or so :-) Each time when the sanitary napkin ad pops up on the T.V, that's my excuse ...

But I managed to use this opportunity to give her an intro to how the caste system was formed, how the kids took up the same profession as their families etc. I explained that since now any body can choose any profession they liked, caste system does not make any sense in this era. I concluded dramatically that there are only two types of people, the Good and the Bad.

We both were satisfied with the discussion, until after an year, when the school asked Harini to fill in her personal details in the Almanac. One of the fields was :
Caste  - FC/BC/OBC/MBC/SC/ST etc etc

My kid was bewildered with the options. She wanted to know which option had to be chosen. I knew it was the moment to assert what I believed in.

I told her that the school had missed one option. I made her write "Not applicable".

Exams vs. learning

Harini's quarterly exams are going on. She had an off day yesterday, in the sense, she had to attend school but there was no exam.

Since it was just half-day school, I let her sleep till late and skip the school. When she woke up, I teasingly asked her what if they really had Hindi exam at school and she missed it?

My child replied "In that case, they will mark me absent or give zero marks". Then she added excitedly, "But Amma, what I studied is going to stay in my brain. I am able to understand Hindi now and I can frame even 3-4 sentences answers on my own. I am sooooo happy".

I was surprised. If I had missed an exam at school or college, I would have howled and cried. But my kid taught me a new lesson. She is blissfully unaware of the mark market. Instead she gives more importance to learning.

I hope her interest in learning new things remains as active as it is.

Taking baby steps

Harini, my darling daughter has turned 8 recently. And for the past few months I have been feeling like a novice mom again. Because even though I can advice a new mom about baby foods, weaning, teething etc., I feel inadequate to keep up with my growing daughter's growing doubts :-)

These questions are not simple enough to be googled about. The answers I give will slowly form my kid's value system. So I need to be extra careful. 

Hence this blog, where I plan to share my experiences, mistakes, concerns and triumphs (if any) !

Harini's recent photo